Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: That's hotties, Steve. Carl Otis Winslow: Society places too much emphasis on being thin. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No thanks, Eddie. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: But you humilate me everyday. I never got less than than an A. Steve Urkel: So, I can't live with that! Laura: Every time we order another course, you bring your chair closer. Not name your state. I felt like I was one with the Bee-Oh-Sphere. Laura and Judy, divide up the rest between Barbie doll fans and Lego lovers and get them upstairs too! Especially this one, since Urkel breaks the fourth wall at the end. I'm being born! [someone has just smashed into Lt. Murtaugh's classic car]. 'Steve Urkel' actor launches cannabis brand on 4/20 Laura: Remember when you tried to teach me how to sew? Harriette Winslow: Oh, well it's nice to meet you, Curtis. [laughs] Bye! Well it's not cool. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [under laughing gas, laughing] I just realized, your name is Doctor Smiley. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Laura, do you mind if your old grandmother tells you a story? And I like the Red Sox. Steve Urkel: Because, I love you love you love you! Eddo. Stefan Urkelle: Where did you learn all that? Everywhere you look, TV, movies, magazines, all these 90 pound people, smiling, dancing where do they get the strength? Laura: Urkel, don't your parents feed you? Rise! Harriette Winslow: [retrieves a coupon from her purse] Ohhh no no no, Carl! Steve Urkel: I will not be bullied! Harriette Winslow: [gives him a tray of drinks] Here, take these with you. Laura: Let's eat everything and see if he can take a joke! I'm starved. If you have something to say, just spit it out. Laura: [grabbing his arm] Ooh! And there is nothing you can do to ever change my mind. [stares at the racist cop] Black. [music abruptly stops] Look at yourselves. Steve Urkel: Ms Steuben, you taught Laura to slow down and stop taking short cuts. Laura Lee Winslow: He didn't need to. I'm cooking breakfast. Myra Monkhouse: No, I came to visit my Aunt Monica, she's the Reverend Mother here, now why on earth would I join a convent? Someday, I'll thank myself for this. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Opens Diary] January 1, We had a wonderful New Years Eve party, except Carl got sick and threw up in the living room. No one's ever called you 'shrimp'. You're acting like animals! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: over and over and over. Stefan Urkelle: Wake me, shake me, break me, but baby, don't forsake me. Laura: Well, that's because you have self-confidence. Steve Urkel: Yes! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: [to Laura] Sugar, I realize you're having a hard time, but you've got to stand up for whatever you believe in, or things will never change. Steve Urkel's Young Neighbor On 'Family Matters' Is All Grown Up - HuffPost Laura: Well, then not even in your dreams. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Cheating is wrong, Eddie, and you should know that. Carl: Son, I am no neophyte when it comes to electronics. Steve Urkel: I'll settle for a toenail clipping! The lovestruck genius of Steve Urkel. Pretty girl, dark hair your sister for God's sake! Rodney Beckett: [after seeing Eddie's music video] I can't believe it. I wanna read it to my mom. Laura: You know, I just don't get why people are so afraid of our history. A bee to a blossom. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Stephan] Laura Winslow, you are the sun, the rain, and the wind that flowers my soul. My parents play this with me all the time! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Ok, you talked me into it. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Ooh, that's nice! It's a "non-date". Steve Urkel: You know what, Laura? The '90s series "Family Matters" may have been about the Chicago-based Winslow family, but the show's breakout character was actually Winslow neighbor Steve Urkel. Laura Lee Winslow: How fast are we going now? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: The librarian, a white man that I'd known all my life, pushed me out into the street and told me never to come back. The Most Memorable Moments From Family Matters - Looper.com Maxine Johnson: Was there a line to get your pictures taken when you guys walked in? It seems the guy that you purchased your stereo equipment from didn't want you to fill in any paper work. [Grabs and kisses her. I bought a new dress and you say you can't take me? Steve Urkel: [shows up in the living room with his flowers from the cemetery] Hi Laura, these are for you. [Waldo nods as Eddie goes to the last one]. Boyd Higgins: Name's Boyd Higgins, but ym friends call me Buck! Eddo. Steve Urkel: I can't! Steve Urkel: Well, because it's different. Carl Otis Winslow: Yeah, bring me a slice. Rachel Crawford: Yeah do you want to be buried or cremated? I think I'm gonna have to fire Waldo, Steve. For that matter why isn't everybody? Carl: What? Gun, Carl. Carl Otis Winslow: What did she have to say? An illustration of a horizontal line over an up pointing arrow. So one day I decided to do something about it. Waldo: Laura, I know I'm just wasting my time, but would you like to kinda, maybe go out with me, sorta, tomorrow night, maybe? Some of our pickup lines are just for laughs. Steve Urkel: Now, relax, Eddie. Laura: Look, I owe you an apology. [Faces Eddie] Look at him, charming, handsome, popular. Where did you get the money for this? Steve Urkel: Oh, positive. Steve Urkel: Laura, suppose I arrange for you to meet Johnny Gill personally. 1. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No, I *am* a serious little nerd. Judy Winslow: Um so Grandma are you gonna be a June bride? If you hit me, do I not sneeze? Just as I thought. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: When you're hurting other people it ain't harmless. No, you're not invited. Harriette Winslow: You were gone for three hours. [the photographer takes a snap shot of Eddie nerously laughing as Carl drives him away]. Steve Urkel: Oh no! This isn't my grandmother. Well, he got it trapped in the rear door of a Buick and was dragged eight and a half blocks. [Carl has just gotten wind of Eddie's plans to have a flier party. Steve Urkel: Okay. Carl Otis Winslow: Oh, now Harriette, that's a bit harsh. And I know that baseball card meant a lot to you. Steve Urkel: Steve Urkel! Steve Urkel: Oh, no buts! I don't ever want to go to that restaurant again. Steve Urkel: [Steve is still wasted] Ooh the Durkel! Ms. Steuben: Get a hold of yourself, Steven. When is that party supposed to be. Steve Urkel: [Steve picks up the cord to the satelite dish] Sloppy, Sloppy, Sloppy! Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: You all right, Mr.W, [he teaches Carl how to handshake in his neighborhood. Steven Quincy Urkel: Look, you've got this big bed. Who? Carl Otis Winslow: Well guess what Harriet, it's not empty. Steve Urkel: Oh great! Kanye West name-dropped "Family Matters" star Steve Urkel on his My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy track, "Dark Fantasy." However, Ye originally thought a similar line rapped by T-Pain was "corny," the "Buy U A Drank" singer claims.. As reported by HipHopDX on Tuesday (Sept. 7), T-Pain says Ye stole the concept for the Urkel-referencing line after hearing a similar lyric on his . Steve Urkel: Oh, no I'm not. Carl Otis Winslow: Thanks for the present son. Laura: Yeah. Chuck is twice the man, Raoul is. Inside this scrawny chest, there beats a heart. Never snort with a hangover! Waldo: Excuse me, but I don't wanna hear about a bug's sex life. I wanna take it home and read it to my mom. It is not empty at all. It better be a dead relative in your excuse. Steve Urkel: I can't help it, Laura. Three times X equals six. Carl Otis Winslow: I understand that. Clarence has under control. Harriette Winslow: Mr. Niedermeyer, the only thing that's gonna go by is you. Laura: Don't argue. With Squeeze I'm not safe nowhere. Get down from there! Steve Urkel: Oh, I see. Cassie Lynn: All's fair in love and politics. Midway through the first season, the show introduced the Winslows' nerdy neighbor Steve Urkel (Jaleel White), who quickly became its breakout character and eventually the show's main character. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Don't you worry, I'll work on him. Harriette Winslow: You have to understand, back in Detroit where he's from, the police are considered the enemy, so he doesn't trust them. Carl Otis Winslow: That a girl, Harriette. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: [cracks a laugh but tries to stop] It's so sad. Steve Urkel: Of course. I'll teach you. The bad news is, he'll charge you an arm and a leg. Steve Urkel: Well, actually, this is Eddie's story. Laura: So do you Max, guess what, Steve rented us a limo. I've been there a 100 times, but this time was different. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: [is chased and hides behind a jock] Hold me back, hold me back. Daniel Wallace: Hey, man. He introduced himself and I was immediately struck by deep brown eyes, his engaging sense of humor and how delicately he handled my cantalopes. Bazooms! What about it, Steve. Verbs are our friends. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: That stinks. And if you call me names, do I not eat? Carl: Of all the names that I have called you , the one that bothers you is butthead? Laura Lee Winslow: If I hadn't started that petition, none of this would've happened. Bushwhacker Luke: Me and me brother, we hate cops! We all stand nice and quiet until Gramps and Granny make it legal. Carl: [in an Urkel like voice and gives Stefan some money] Here takes some casher rooney and fix it sooney. Ms. Steuben: Oh, good. And, he's got something that he didn't have before. It's not funny, it's dangerous. 430+ Dirtiest Pick Up Lines Ever - TheStallionStyle Laura Lee Winslow: First you better sprout a chest. Rachel Crawford: Thanks Steve. My, what strong arms. Halawna, Oneisha: [pop up in the car Clarence stole] Surprise! Steve Urkel: [drinking spiked punch] What is this? Carl: Are you implying that you're not having a good time? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Dad, when are we leaving? You've got twenty-four hours to drop out of the race or we publish the picture. I probably had the heater up on high and they wilted. Carl: Stefan, you gotta help me. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: [Unstraps his gloves] Sir, not only have you harrassed and insulted me, but you have sullied the reputation of my lady love. Steven Quincy Urkel is a fictional character on the American ABC/CBS sitcom Family Matters, portrayed by Jaleel White. Steve Urkel: [reading] "No mouth breathing, no snorting, no drooling". I can't! I tried to help you! Your father waited at the Box Office for an hour. Self respect. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: These last 2 weeks have been wonderful for me. Mont gio sam eea!". Carl Otis Winslow: No. Steve Urkel: Oh, I'm not joking. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: [laughing] Good one, Myrtle!